It seems our favorite morning beverage named acquitted double murderer is back in the news. According to the morbidly obese runner's blog, OJ Simpson has now penned a book that describes what would have happened if he had killed Nichole. The corpulent one asks the silly question, "If he didn't do it, why this?". He asks, I answer.
Very simple. OJ has spent all of his money over the past twelve years on private detectives to find the real killers of Nichole Simpson and Ron Goldman. Do you think the LAPD is going to do this? Don't kid yourself. They framed OJ with an efficiency and ruthlessness that would make those NASA people who faked the moon landing proud. Would they admit their own incompetence by arresting the real perpetrator? That would be like Buzz Aldrin taking you to the place in the dessert where they killed Jimmy Hoffa for killing Kennedy. Not. Gonna. Happen.
Instead, OJ has devised a brilliant plan to find the real killers and earn some cash by writing this classy little memoir. His description in the book of the killing is so ridiculously incompetent that it will offend the professional dignity of the cold blooded pros who actually committed the murder. They will start complaining to friends that "that's not how it really happened" and before long, the rumor mill will catch up to them and OJ will fly to Brentwood and collar them himself.
That or AC Cowlings will write his own memoir, "That's not how it went down, OJ".
Anyhow, I don't see the big deal. Nobody complained when Truman Capote wrote "In Cold Blood".
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